fatespoken | ∞ [twenty-seven]

[ private | unhackable ]

You're fucking pathetic, Amory.

You keep reminding yourself of what you could have done, how you could have helped her - but what what's the point? Isn't this what you wanted? To live your life by Dissociation and Indifference. That model of life in which you don't have to bother with all the frivolities and requirements of friendship. If you didn't care, if you had been more careful not to get in this far-

But what are you even trying say, anyway? It's all just fucking empty rhetoric. Do you just like hearing yourself talk, Amory? You can't string together sense if you tried.

The truth is you're guilty because you care about her. Because she's your friend. Just like all the others. And you just can't avoid it, no matter how you try to pretend you don't have a heart.

...But even if you admit you wanted to help, what could you have done? You could have had the ability to help - the ability to do so fucking much, except that you're selfish. Not only to help Eden, to save the lives of all those people back home.

But my life forfeit for theirs? I can't do it. For faces I don't even know? Even if it's what I'm supposed to do- But they're the cause of their own fates anyways, every negative action reflects back on the cycle-

...its too early in the morning for this shit. this same old fucking garbage. just leave it alone

[/private]

Too bad all the fairies from that curse disappeared. I collected a few in a shoebox after a round of batting practice. Planned to pin them on my door like some fashion of lawn gnome (or door fairy in this case), and I even had the layout all planned in my head.

Too bad.

By the way,

playstheblues? I don't think I can make it to work today. I've got headache like a jackhammer's fucking with my brain and I'd rather not go to work, where I'll most likely be 90% useless. But I'm not going to let you down, Blue. I'm not that type of employee, you know? So I'm going to spend my day home, researching drinks for that party at the Blue Light. I'll even test each of them out, just to make sure they're not some sort of noxious concoction. And I won't use moonshine, as I promised. Even though I suspect I can make some damn good bathtub gin.

Here's one, for example:

Mary Pickford
◈ 1 1/2 oz white rum
◈ 1 oz unsweetened pineapple juice
◈ 1/2 teaspoon grenadine
Strain into chilled cocktail glass and drop in a maraschino cherry.

It's like a feminine version of the Piña Colada minus the coconut, especially with that half teaspoon of grenadine. Though the Piña Colada is already fruity shit, so this is definitely a woman's drink. It's named after Mary Pickford— America's sweetheart and starlet of the silent film age. Ever watch Little Lord Fauntleroy? She was the girl you'd stick on your walls back then, all curls and saccharine smiles, and not a tit in sight. Ironically enough, she was actually Canadian.

So I'm just going to stay put with my bottle of aspirin and my liquor. I'll test as many as I can and do a write-up when I'm done. Sound good?

[ ooc; he's already intoxicated, since he's been drinking half of the night. which is why his post is all over the place. ;;

bedtime nao, will pick up tags when i'm up! ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yes, Mother. I understand, but I frankly don't give a damn.

Enough.

Nobody gives a damn before they get one.

Interesting.

Do you actually realize how completely annoying you are? It's like you're this petulant flying thing that refuses to leave.

You need a drink.

I realise you don't like talking about anything that actually bothers you, and hence my raising the issue is annoying. Which is interesting. Most people with an alcohol problem try to cover that problem up, you don't. Which means you're using the alcohol to cover something else.

Not today.

What are you some sort of Psychiatrist now? You're over thinking things, Chase. I'm just a simple guy that enjoys a hedonistic way of life. Why cover it if I'm not ashamed?

You're getting your isms muddled up. I'm not psychiatrist, no, but you see enough people with the same symptoms it's safe to take a bet at a similar cause. And I don't think I'm wrong.

Am I? A hedonist is someone who considers happiness and pleasure the central focus of their life. Getting drunk off my ass is what I consider fucking pleasure, so I don't give a damn about the consequences. I'm more happy with it than without it.

What do you want? My life story?

Alcohol's a downer, which means regular, excessive drinkers are only enjoying themselves more because of the senses it deadens. It also means the more you drink, the more you need to kill whatever anxiety or depression you're self medicating. It's not rocket science.

Would you give it to me if I asked?

No need to spoon feed me he how's and why's of alcohol. I know what it does, and I know why I drink, and I also know there's nothing to kill- nothing that can be killed. So why don't you get off it?

No.

Strangely enough I don't actually think you're stupid, so do me the same favour. I don't doubt you know what you're doing, either.

Nothing that can be killed?

I don't think you're stupid, I just think you're unbelievably annoying.

Nope.

Why do you keep talking to annoying people? Maybe you are stupid.

So you're not as human as you look.

You're the one who commented in the first place. I'm just trying to tell you to get off my lawn.

And what the fuck does that mean? I'm as human as it gets. Kill me and I die.

Edited 2009-08-26 09:42 (UTC)

It means if there's nothing to kill it implies you also have an indestructible liver.

But fine. You just drink, alone in your room, because it's fun.

Hardly. I know my liver will eventually give out, but it'll last me long enough.

Finally, you get it.

Lasted my mum forty-two years. I hope you get luckier.

I'll be more than satisfied if it keeps functioning for that long.

Seen Eden yet?

Not yet. Didn't even know she's open for visitors.

I don't know that she is. I haven't heard anything since word got out that she was okay.

Then I know as much as you know, Chase.

And look, you ~~seem to be better~~ didn't die

~~You're going to need to cut out the alcohol around her.~~

I don't have time to die, too many of the rest of you seem set on it. Someone blew up part of my damn building earlier.

[ if this was audio, you'd hear him chuckling. yes, his bad luck his amusing ]

Fate really does seem to hate you, Chase. I'd watch out for following objects next.

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worksmart.livejournal.com - 2009-08-26 12:02 (UTC) - Expand

fatespoken - 2009-08-26 12:21 (UTC) - Expand

∞ [twenty-seven]

careful precision

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he wants to punch chase in the face so much /sob

while naked going on the icon

hahaha. >_>; i like expression

there is a difference between hitting and hitting -on-, Amory ;)

the^ expression | and he'd prefer the former, right now. :<

i know i know i kid.

...though he won't deny chase is good-looking. not that he'll ever say it |D

sob, it would be one way to shut him up.

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